Change Comes In Many Forms…

…and all the time. Sometimes it is good and sometimes it is bad. The lesson I am currently learning is that when things happen I should take note and see how I can grow from it. How can this make me more aware, better, smarter, more understanding.
A friend of mine lost her fight against cancer this weekend. She was a bright light in a grimy city. She had a positive energy that rubbed off on everyone and I learned a lot from her. Even now I am learning from her. I’m learning not to take things for granted. To look to the further but not lose sight of now. To take the time to appreciate my surroundings no matter where I am. I’m learning to find the amazing in everything. I hope you can find this too.

October 12, 2011. Tags: , , . admiration, Advice. Leave a comment.

“You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever.”

Every website, newspaper, water cooler conversation, and TV channel is talking about the death of Steve Jobs. Why lend my voice to the hum of sadness all over the world? Because it matters. Truthfully, before yesterday I hadn’t really known a whole lot about Steve Jobs. I knew he was an innovator, a creator, an entrepreneur, a guy I sometimes cursed at when my iPhone froze. What did I didn’t know was how insightful he was. How truly in touch he was to the human world. He wasn’t just another nerdy computer guy. He was smart, thoughtful, and touching. I’m a bit embarrassed to say that I had never watched his Stanford Commencement Address before. I didn’t see this side of him. I truthfully didn’t see him. So after watching it. I read it. It resonates so much with everything I’ve been thinking. He is truly one of the greatest teachers we will ever know. Here is the link to the Address he delivered. I hope it touches you like it did me. Below is an excerpt that rang especially true. You will be missed Steve Jobs.

“When I was 17, I read a quote that went something like: “If you live each day as if it was your last, someday you’ll most certainly be right.” It made an impression on me, and since then, for the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: “If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?” And whenever the answer has been “No” for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.

Remembering that I’ll be dead soon is the most important tool I’ve ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything — all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure – these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.”

October 6, 2011. Tags: , , , , , , , . admiration, Advice. 3 comments.

The Speech of All Speeches


I am the maid of honor at my best friends wedding…in three weeks…OMG I literally just stopped typing, looked at my desk top calendar and recounted. THREE WEEKS. And I have a speech to write.
Normally, I’m a fine speaker. I don’t punctuate pauses with “um” or “like.” I can be witty, heartfelt, all around okay. But as the date grows nearer I realize that this isn’t just me standing in front of people talking. Which believe it or not, I actually don’t like doing. But me, standing there telling a large group of people how much I love these two people.
I love them so much I’ve been watching YouTube videos on “Best Maid of Honor Wedding Speeches” (Which as much as I love these people I am not rapping…) I’ve been going to the library for love quotes and etiquette books and so on and so forth. This means so much to me, that I’m over thinking it. So, today, I’ve decided to just sit down and write. Write about everything I know/love about them.
So my question to you is, when was the last time you sat down and thought about how much you really love someone other than your significant other? It really is a heartwarming experience. You should try it sometime.

October 5, 2011. Tags: , , , , . admiration, Advice. Leave a comment.

I’ve Been Watching A Lot of Oprah Lately…

…which has both fed my mind and made me even more discontent than before. I was watching an interview she gave to the COO of Facebook which aired on OWN last night and I couldn’t help but have my own personal little “Ah ha” moment. Oprah was talking about the point where she finally decided to start her own network. She said she asked herself, “What would you do if you weren’t afraid?” So then I asked myself, what would you do if you weren’t afraid? I would write. Though I enjoy writing my blog, Facebook status updates, silly texts and notes; it’s not what I want. I want to write fiction. I want to get lost in my characters. I spend so much of my day imagining scenarios for everyone around me that sometimes I forget that my made-up world isn’t their reality at all.
So, what would you do if you weren’t afraid? Would you bake cakes all day? Would you become a pilot? A lawyer? A doctor? A teacher? What would you do, if you weren’t afraid?

October 3, 2011. Tags: , , , , , , . admiration, Advice. 2 comments.

When I’m Feeling Low…

… I sometimes look up Academy award-winning speeches. Have you ever watched the Academy Awards? Have you ever not gotten teary eyed or just felt so much joy for someone else?
So today. Today hasn’t quite been my day. I sat down, I did some work, then I googled one of my all time favorite speeches, Julia Roberts.
You can see her shaking and so incredibly happy she looks like she’s going to burst. When I see things like this my heart grows bigger. I feel complete joy. I feel honored to watch such a huge momentous, emotional moment. I feel like I’m a part of it, even though lets face it, I’m not. So, if you are feeling like a little pick me up. Then please watch this speech. There are others too, but this one takes the cake for me.

December 2, 2010. Tags: , , , , , , , . admiration. Leave a comment.

I Want to Be a Kid Again…

…because the toys are SOOO much cooler! So I have a two-and-a-half year-old nephew who, well gets what ever he wants from his Auntie. I can’t help it. He’s too cute to resist. So in the search for the perfect toy for my adorable little man I searched the Toys-R-Us website, Target, and Amazon.com. for fun and exciting ideas. Holy Batman was there a lot to choose from. Granted he is a boy, I still had to check out the newest and coolest stuff for girls.
Thus, I want to be a kid again. Mom, I want this, or this, or maybe this…except maybe in a grown up size…
The toys have gotten cooler, flashier and faster. The only problem I have is that there is less and less imagination used when playing with these things. Good thing for an adult I’ve got an AMAZING imagination!!! Happy Holidays Everyone!

To read more of my stuff click here!

November 30, 2010. Tags: , , , , . admiration. Leave a comment.

Random Friday: How Hard Is It to Get Published…

…since Hilary Duff is now on the best sellers list and James Franco is doing book readings and signings at Barnes & Noble…Perhaps they got into acting really wanting to be authors. Or maybe they are so hounded by the paps that their only outlet is writing. I don’t know but I miss the authors of yesteryear. Yes, Austen, Shakespeare, Twain, J.K Rowlings, Tolkien…

Moving on…

Why is technology so much more difficult to use the older I get? I use a computer everyday. During the week I’m at the computer all day. So why is it I can’t get my stupid slide show on my MAC to load correctly onto a disk? Am I becoming the “older” generation? The generation that just doesn’t get it? Cause I really don’t get Ke$ha but somehow I get Lady Gaga? Who is this Bieber kid (yes I looked up how to spell his name…) and why does he look like Jody Foster when she was a kid? Begrudgingly I already sometimes respond with “eh?” with a quizzical confused look on my face.
Whatever, at least its Friday.

PS- After listening to the link of James Franco reading (see above) I kinda wanna read it…Don’t judge…

PSS- I want to ask this guy to lunch and ask his opinion on how the world of celebrity has been diminished to fart jokes and nose jobs. I think he’d have great things to say…

October 22, 2010. Tags: , , , , , , , . admiration, blog, Blogger, books, career, change, Doubt, Lady Gaga, Uncategorized. Leave a comment.

And When I Grow Up…

…I’ll be a billionaire! Or maybe not. Remember when you were a little boy or girl and you used to fantasize about your life as a grown up? Do you remember spending all day on your Grandma’s tire swing pretending you were a famous singer? Well maybe that was just me…but nevertheless I’m sure you remember wanting big magical things for yourself.
I still want big magical things for myself.
Now I just have to figure out where that mysterious life path is and follow it. I feel like Little Red Ridding Hood without a flashlight or a compass and instead of the Big Bad Wolf on my heals its self doubt and monthly bills.
I’m a bit lost, a little scared, and a lot poor. I am apparently your typical American. Go figure.
So this is an open question to those of you who have found the dream, who are happy and content in the career/life that you’ve chosen. How did you know? What did you do? How did you figure out the age-old question of “what do I want to be when I grow up”? I’m serious. I want to know. I thought I knew, maybe I still do, maybe I’m just impatient? I’m thinking I need to just close my eyes and pick the name out of a hat and go with it. Career by Ouija Board…

October 21, 2010. Tags: , , , . admiration, Advice, blog, Blogger, Bored, career, change, Doubt, Imperfect, revelation, satisfaction, Stressed, tired, Uncategorized, unhappy, wishes, Woman, work, writing. 1 comment.

Choose to Love not Hate

I know that normally my posts are light-hearted and silly but today I would like to take the opportunity to add my voice to the many that believe hate is not the answer. I sat in a court room yesterday, fulfilling civic duty, when I was regretfully pulled into a world of hate. I won’t go into the trial at hand because I think it will already get enough media attention that it doesn’t deserve, but the premise was that the person being tried is full of hate followed by deplorable actions and from what I can tell very little to no remorse. It honestly scared me.
I live it San Francisco. I am very aware that there is a dark and ugly world out there and like most Americans I watch the news or read the newspaper feel sympathy or even empathy then go on with my own very narrow life. Yesterday, I was pushed into the ugliness of hate and it got me to really think and look around at the world that I am apart of. I am a human being with a voice. Anyone that knows me knows that it is a loud and boisterous voice when in use. I chose to use my voice today to say that hate is not the answer.
I was picked on as a kid, not as much as some, but I was still bullied at times. It hurts. I watched kids in my classes get bullied for not having the right clothes, being poor, having an absent parent, for being a different race, or for being a different sexual orientation. I was one of the lucky ones; I was simply picked on for my height. I have quite a backbone and a solid support system. I learned a pivotal lesson at a very young age however; it hurts to be made fun of. So treat others as you wish to be treated. I know this seems tripe and silly, but honestly, try it. Next time you see someone who looks different or acts different or feels different put yourself in their shoes. Try to at least give them the benefit of the doubt.
Teenagers can be cruel and heartless, they often times don’t realize what their words really mean or the impact that they can have on another human being. Adults should know better. As an adult I have witnessed more hate and bigotry than I ever did in the halls of my high school. It makes me sick to see people who can be so close minded and filled with such hate for someone they don’t know, understand, or have any right to judge. I watched this clip late last week and it struck a chord. I’m not asking for everyone to hold hands and sing kumbaya, but I am asking that if you disagree with a lifestyle then to at least keep your mouth shut and move on. What a stranger does is none of your business. I don’t ask what you do in your home Rush Limbaugh; it’s none of your business what anyone else does in theirs.

October 20, 2010. Tags: , , , , , , . admiration, Advice, blog. Leave a comment.

Random Friday

So I’m going to start Random Friday’s since my brain during this time is like a spastic two-year old. I’m all over the place. So here’s the run down on today’s randomness.
I went to the library like I do every three weeks to get books and audio books (I listen to them on my 45 minute one way commute- don’t judge.) While I was there this week I was actually pretty disappointed in the selection. So instead of getting any new audio books I grabbed a few CD’s. Mainly musicals I can sing along to and in the mix was Evita.
The Madonna version.
When this movie came out I was in junior high and fell madly in love with the drama of it and how a nation could love anyone so completely (with the few exceptions…) Anyway, so I’ve been listening to this CD for the last couple of days and of course it got me curious about the real Eva Paron so what do I do? I wikipedia her! Dude, her corps was moved a bunch of times and viewed to the public far more than necessary in my opinion. Anyway, I found this fascinating and wanted to share. Feeling the need to watch Evita sometime soon…Gotta love me some Antonio Banderas!

October 15, 2010. Tags: , , , , , , , . admiration, blog, books, change, Love, revelation, sadness, Uncategorized, Woman, work. Leave a comment.

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